The New County Wife - Singular Political Woman

Act II Scene I

It is now some 18 months since we left "The New Country Wife", Samantha Shag, and her plotting husband Sir Alan. In this time, much water, as they say, has passed under the bridge.

Sir Alan has failed in his attempt to implicate Samantha in an affair with her riding instructor, and it is she who has divorced him. He is now rumoured to be wedding the former wife of a Russian oligarch subject to "satisfactory pre-nuptial agreement". His energy and resources joint venture with Sir Ron Fastmoney is still on the cards, as is a possible peerage for both of them.

Samantha has also decided to enter the political arena. The sex industry, in which she occupies a thoroughly respectable position, has been doing very well, and Samantha feels that as a successful business woman she now has much to offer public life.

However, whilst the "allure of azure" last year turned Samantha's head in the direction of David Cameron's Conservatives, her well-developed political instincts have now secured her the position of Liberal Democrat parliamentary candidate in a by-election following the resignation of the existing incumbent after a series of sex scandals.

The constituency, in a suburb of Birmingham, is ideally suited to Samantha's professional demographic as a key part of her business involves the provision of what she describes as "naughties" for women to buy at home-based parties. Indeed, this loyal clientele has provided an excellent campaign team.

Although some former members of the Social Democrats have re-joined the Labour Party as a consequence of Samantha's selection, she is, nevertheless, confident of victory in the forthcoming by-election. She regards herself as a "true liberal", and as someone who can restore the brightness of the Lib Dem's star, currently somewhat dimmed by Coalition politics.

Samantha's only regret at the present time is that she, along with children Zara and Harry, did not receive an invitation to the recent British Royal Wedding. The event has, however, set this singular political woman wondering whether re-entry to the married ranks might be good for her future ministerial career.