The story so far....
Sir Alan Shag - knighted during the John Major Government, later switching his allegiance to New Labour - is now in his mid 50s, and contemplating a change of Party (back to the Conservatives) and wife (someone more conservative than former doyenne of the Birmingham bondage scene, Samantha Shag). Substantial donations to New Labour have not brought that much-desired peerage (Lord Shag of Solihull), with accompanying ministerial appointment (following in the footsteps of Lord Digby de B'rm), so Sir Alan is now courting "Heir to Blair David" Cameron.
With an early fortune made in carpet manufacturing, Sir Alan transferred his indisputable business cunning to housebuilding and the motor trade in the 1980s, for services to which he was later knighted. However, he has never forgotten his commercial beginnings and his neo-palladian mansion in Warwickshire is fittingly known as "The Shag Pile". It is here that Sir Alan and Samantha Shag now reside with little Harry and Zara; where his wife and children receive riding lessons from former guards officer Captain James Blewitt, and where he employs "Apprentice" Tristram (Oxford graduate and former right-of-centre think tank researcher) for advice on political etiquette.
Hoping that Samantha might be having an affair with James Blewitt - and indeed, positively encouraging this - Sir Alan has engaged the services of a "private eye" and ex-secret service operative Richard "Spook" Dickinson to provide evidence for his much hoped for divorce. Tristam, meanwhile, is researching possible future marriage partners for his employer, paying particular attention to women from old Worcestershire gentry and aristocratic families who might want to develop their country estates for affordable housing, and similarly worthy projects.
However, Samantha (nee Bond, and former Proprietress of The Birmingham - Strictly Adults Only -Bond Age Club) is aware of her husband's plot, and has her own plans. Upon their marriage in the early "Naughties" (as she likes to call the beginnings of the 21st century), Samantha encouraged Sir Alan to invest in some enterprises in the respectable sectors of the sex industry, which, as it happens, are now performing rather better than his housebuilding and motor trade interests. Whilst enjoying the life of a country gentlewoman, Samantha has also tired of Sir Alan's company, and longs to return to "The Business"; not, however, ruling out a future career in politics herself ...with the Lib Dems.
To be continued...
